How do I manage my ADHD?

I am a neurodiversity informed counsellor and have received specialist training on supporting people with attention deficit and hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). In this blog I thought I would explore what kind of things I can do to help and support people with ADHD and the things people can do to help themselves.

For more information on how I can support you with ADHD, to book a session, or just have a chat please contact me on 07742 209312 or nicole@greenoaktherapies.co.uk

Someone with ADHD may struggle with:

Task Management

Problems in organising thoughts or actions into a coherent order. Problems prioritising tasks and starting them. This means that someone may get overwhelmed and give up. Problems planning and prioritising. Problems processing complex instructions and breaking them down and ordering each task. Inability to plan and prioritise will affect someone’s ability to study, work and meet their goals.

When we can organise our thoughts, we feel much more in control and less stressed. We feel a sense of achievement, engagement and efficiency in being organised. Without organisation we can easily become overwhelmed.

I can help you to break tasks down into smaller, more manageable steps to stop you getting overwhelmed. Work backwards from what you want to achieve to work out each step. Organise just one area at a time. Be patient with yourself

Focus

Problems focussing and easily distracted. There are issues focussing on something and maintaining that focus. There are also issues with shifting focus from one thing to another. Problems remaining alert and sustaining effort. Non stimulating tasks are very hard to do, and the information may go in much more slowly and take several attempts to go in than for a neurotypical brain. This means that there is often a slower processing speed, which has nothing to do with intellect.

Research shows that short intense periods of concentration work best. Try doing 30 minutes of focus and then taking a break. The more stressed the person is, the harder this becomes. Therefore, the calmer the person can remain the better.

Working Memory

This is the ability to hold information in the mind long enough to work or play with it. Remembering, recalling, absorbing. These issues with working memory mean that people with ADHD may struggle to reflect on things, to think of the consequences of their actions. They may not learn from experience and so may make the same mistake several times. It may also be hard to think of the impact of their actions on others or on future tasks.

They may not remember the steps involved in a task and the order of those steps. They may forget appointments, or to take their medications. They may forget what they want to say in a conversation, and so to avoid this they may butt in.

When someone cannot do things that seem so simple to others, they start to feel stupid and this can bring shame, guilty and anger as well as frustration as not being able to do what they want to do.

To help improve working memory try doing mental maths, storytelling, memory games, poetry and acting.

Time Management

Someone with ADHD really struggles with time management. It is said that there are only two times for someone with ADHD, ‘now or not now’. They may therefore struggle with time concepts like seasons, days, weeks and months. They may be unable to estimate how long something may take. They may be unable to stick to deadlines or attend appointments. They may struggle to understand how long a task will take and so not be able to budget time effectively. They may struggle to create effective routines. 

To help with time management use visual planners, white boards and analogue (clock face) clocks.

Inhibitory Control

An ADHD brain really struggles with controlling itself, as the prefrontal cortex (whose job this is) is not working properly. Someone with ADHD may therefore struggle with resisting temptation, avoiding distractions and maintaining focus. Trying to stay on task therefore absorbs a lot of energy and creates a lot of frustration for someone with ADHD.

An ADHD brain also struggles to self-monitor, to gauge and be aware of their behaviour and comply with societal behaviours. They may therefore blurt out their thoughts without thinking something through. They may interrupt others. They may make inappropriate comments or perform inappropriate actions.

Often, someone is aware that they are doing something inappropriate but cannot stop themselves. This therefore leads to shame, guilt, frustration and anger. They can become sensitive and start to withdraw and become hypervigilant. They may start to pick on small signals of disapproval from others and may misinterpret them and have an emotional outburst.

I can help you to become more self-aware and teach you skills to stay in control. To help develop more self-awareness try keeping a diary or journal and regularly reflecting on things.

Emotional Regulation

Without the prefrontal cortex effectively controlling the emotions of the limbic system someone with ADHD will struggle with emotions as they are felt far rawer and intensely. They often struggle with low frustration tolerance and be extremely sensitive to criticism, often triggering overwhelming emotions.

Emotional reactions can therefore be very intense and difficult to manage. This can be very damaging to the person and lead to shame, guilt, avoidance and people pleasing. It is also very hard to be rational when you are experiencing strong emotions.

I can teach you skills to recognise and manage your emotions. I can support you with the feelings of overwhelm, shame, guilt, anxiety and frustration often suffered by those with ADHD.

For more information on how I can support you with ADHD, to book a session, or just have a chat please contact me on 07742 209312 or nicole@greenoaktherapies.co.uk

Check out my other blogs:

What is Counselling? – Green Oak Therapies

How does Catching and Challenging our Thoughts Help our Mental Health? – Green Oak Therapies

Top 10 Ways to Improve Your Mental Health – Green Oak Therapies